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Les Royer 
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Location: Carson, Iowa
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 Topic: This weeks thought from the pot
Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 10:18am |
I'm always complaining. To the nurse that we never hear much from the offspring. I guess that's a good thing, that they are doing well and don't need the help from the old man anymore. But it kinda bothers me when a year rills around and I didn't see either one of em. Even the phone calls are months apart. One is 2 hours away in Des Moines, the other Montgomery Alabama. Don't know how many hours that iz. Theres a couple of grandchildren, but him and his wife have split up, and their even further way, in Crawfordville Florida. Oldest is in school now. Only seen em a couple of times.
The nurse says it's a two way street. If ya wanna see the young ens, yer gonna have to drive to them. Yeah, she's right as always. But it's kinda hard when yer not retired yet, an yer still tryin to scratch out a living.
It was 2008. The boys final year in college. And he's a sports fanatic. By gosh if there was a ping pong match on TV he was watching it. And I told him. If by some miracle Iowa State makes it to a bowl game, I'll take ya to it. He he . Nothing to worry about. Iowa State had gone 2 wins and 10 losses the year before. Probably since the pigskin game was invented. My bet was safe. Couple of months later, I'm standing at the gates of Yankee Stadium, about to witness the first ever pinstripe bowl game. To bad they lost tho. And I never made that wager again.
Fast forward to yesterday. The boy calls. The nurse hands me the phone. I whisper to the nurse, "Are you sure it's him? What's his name again?" The look from the nurse wasn't a pleasant one. He invites me to go to the Alamo Bowl. No expenses paid. You'd think I'd be thrilled, but I'm not. I gotta ride in a van. With 6 of the in-laws. An we ain't got nothing in common. They are all Iowa State Allumni. And Iowa State football is their passion. Nothing ranks higher. And to sit in that van and having to listen to the singing of the Iowa State fight song all the way to San Antonio, well, I'd rather hear fingernails on a chalkboard. Just can't seem to get my self to believe it would be a good time. Part of it, is the expense of it all. The expenses are split 8 ways. The nurse gets to stay home. I'd rather use that money some other way with the son. But I don't know what.
Grin and bear it? What would you do?
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I still gots my A/C but it's clear out in the barn now.
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Sugarmaker
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 10:40am |
Les, Guess you could say NO, but it is that boy whats his name!:) or Go, but eat lots of beans the day before!:) They will have something else to talk about besides football. Bring some well drilling stats with you too. Have them written out on a long list. Like: Most wells drilled in a year, deepest well drilled, most distance traveled to drill a well, most water capacity in well drilling history, How many different types and styles of drilling bits you have, Most feet drilled in a day, top 10 hardest drilling jobs you ever did ..... You get the drift. Should be very quite in there for several miles after one or two of the drilling stats is spewed forth! I think if you follow each football story with one of these, it could be a very quite enjoyable ride. Might even get a nap in, cept for the gas! Just sayin! And trin to help here.
Hey you need to get that WD back in the shop. Dont forget to pick up some kitty litter too.
Regards, Chris |
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D17 1958 (NFE), WD45 1954 (NFE), WD 1952 (NFE), WD 1950 (WFE), Allis F-40 forklift, Allis CA, Allis D14, Ford Jubilee, Many IH Cub Cadets, 32 Ford Dump, 65 Comet.
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chaskaduo
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 11:16am |
Quick fall down in front of the nurse (but do it carefully) and howl in pain my back my back. 
Edited by chaskaduo - 03 Dec 2018 at 11:16am
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1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp
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Ray54
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 11:43am |
You could send the nurse, but that will cost even more  .
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weiner
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 12:00pm |
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And you can practice smiling and saying nice things! Oh yes, have a nice enjoyable trip. (:
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Real heros wear dogtags, not capes.
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Thad in AR.
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 12:08pm |
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Just do what the Nurse tells you to. That’s what I do.
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Tbone95
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 12:22pm |
As much as I totally understand the predicament just as you laid out, the question itself is simple: do you want to spend time with your son or not? He's invited you on this trip based on a memory of something else you did together, 10 years ago. When will the next opportunity arise? Sometimes, even though father and son, the common interests, common thinking, being similar people, just aren't there. You said it yourself, you'd like to spend it with the boy some other way, but you don't know what.
Edited by Tbone95 - 03 Dec 2018 at 12:23pm
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Ted J
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 2:12pm |
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Tbone95 hit the nail on the head....
You get to spend time with your son......
If you would rather,,,,,,,,come up with some excuse, but have the backup plan ready. i.e.
I can't go with, I've got..........BUT, how about the weekend after that, we go do......
Might make you both happy.
He's just trying to reach you and share something that he has fun with. Apparently he doesn't want to spend time in the shop working on oil dripping, ole Ferd trucks, or ole cars. He must have other interests. You just have to find a common ground and/or start something that you both can have fun with and get to share each other. It's a game of give and take.
Sure wish I could do that with my Dad.....he's been gone now 33 years.....if only I could spend 5 minutes with him.....
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"Allis-Express"
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DiyDave
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Posted: 03 Dec 2018 at 6:43pm |
X2 on the beans, Les. Been workin on a can of walmart generic refried beans, all week, had burritos of my own concoction, fer lunch. Swiss cheese and bacon bits, mixed in, too, fer extra added aroma! Can't imagine the volume of gas, they would produce, iffn you was to eat the whole can!
[TUBE]pu9pO-rCzy4[/TUBE]
Edited by DiyDave - 03 Dec 2018 at 6:47pm
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Hubert (Ga)engine7
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 9:10am |
If the Nurse is cool with it make the trip and spend some time with your son and take an interest in what is important to him. If you like I can send you my chili recipe.  And remember "well bless your heart" is southern for "do you think I really give a chit." Use this trip to build on your relationship with your son and maybe you can set up an outing for just the two of you later. Never pass up an opportunity to spend time with family or friends, it could be your last opportunity.
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Just an old country boy saved by the grace of God.
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shameless dude
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 9:12am |
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or eat a couple of cheeze runza's along with the beans...don't hafta ask me how I knows this...
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shameless dude
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 9:15am |
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i'm kinda in the same boat Les. one of the stockholders bought a new house in Scottsdale AZ and wants all the other stockholders to join them there in March. I ain't going, I ain't flying, we have nothing in common, if'n you wanna go in my place...i'll let you!
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desertjoe
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 9:23am |
 shameless dude wrote:
i'm kinda in the same boat Les. one of the stockholders bought a new house in Scottsdale AZ and wants all the other stockholders to join them there in March. I ain't going, I ain't flying, we have nothing in common, if'n you wanna go in my place...i'll let you! |
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chaskaduo
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 9:39am |
DJ they would probably prefer it.
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1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp
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RonnieJones
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 9:56am |
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I would just be happy if one of my sons thought of me. I personally would go just to spend some time with him. If you can do it financially. Could be one one of the best trips you do with him but you won't know unless you go.
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mdm1
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 12:57pm |
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Just a thought. Maybe your son doesn't want to go with the inlaws either and would like some friendly company. Don't blame just the kid. He has to work at makin a buck too I would assume. Don't be the guy What If?
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Everything is impossible until someone does it! WD45-trip loader 1947 c w/woods belly mower, 1939 B, #3 sickle mower 1944 B, 2 1948 G's. Misc other equipment that my wife calls JUNK!
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Ron(AB)
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 2:33pm |
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Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't this about a grandson?
Big difference...if you want to see you son, yes then go visit. If it is your grandson, it depends. How well do you get along? Maybe a family dinner including your wife would be better.
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mdm1
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 2:39pm |
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I thought it was a son.
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Everything is impossible until someone does it! WD45-trip loader 1947 c w/woods belly mower, 1939 B, #3 sickle mower 1944 B, 2 1948 G's. Misc other equipment that my wife calls JUNK!
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desertjoe
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 3:17pm |
Hey Les,,don't beat yourself up bout the Boy,,it just seems to be a sign of these new times as the things that were important to us don't mean nuttin to the younger generation,,but ole MDM may have a point in that your Son is needin some company for HIM,,,,and,,,and,,,thet In-law may be some pretty and quite friendly and,,,,and,,it a loooooong way down thar,,,,of course you may wind up havin to catch a bus comin back,,,but you'll have plenty of time to come up with a good story for the nurse as to what happened that they kicked you off the van,,,,, Chit,,,wasn't much help,,was I,,??
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Thad in AR.
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 3:35pm |
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Les I want you to think back a few years and remember the advice you gave me.
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mdm1
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 4:04pm |
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I had breakfast with a couple of forum members today and we had a similar discussion. When I was young no one was open past 5:00 and closed on Sundays. Nobody had any money so you spent alot of time with family. Now both parents work, kids are busy, you have just so much time. How often did you call or visit your parents when you were that age? I am a guilty one. I am lucky as my son hunts with me one on one and we get to solve world problems over an adult drink or two. He's a good friend!
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Everything is impossible until someone does it! WD45-trip loader 1947 c w/woods belly mower, 1939 B, #3 sickle mower 1944 B, 2 1948 G's. Misc other equipment that my wife calls JUNK!
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Ted J
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Posted: 04 Dec 2018 at 11:43pm |
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Thanks agin for breakfast Mike!! John sure has a good memory doesn't he?!
I agree, especially that part about "WHAT IF?"
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"Allis-Express"
19?? WC / 1941 C / 1952 CA / 1956 WD45 / 1957 WD45 / 1958 D-17
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Dakota Dave
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Posted: 05 Dec 2018 at 9:59pm |
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Volunteer to co drive and grab that coveted shotgun seat. Else you'll be in the back getting some siesta time in.
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fixer1958
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Posted: 06 Dec 2018 at 6:56pm |
If you really want to see him do it and eat it and chalk up to what the old folks are supposed do. Gotta be nice too but not like it. He will understand in time....maybe.
I know my youngest son can piss me off to no end for some of the chit he does. You know I have thought about that a lot trying to figure him out and the conclusion is I did the same type of chit almost verbatim and not put a second thought about it at the time.
It don't come to you when you are supposed to be old and wise, but then that thought pops in....Huh, that sounds familiar. I just tell the wife to roll with it, I did the same chit. Usually not acceptable.
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Les Royer
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Posted: 07 Dec 2018 at 12:07pm |
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Yeah, and if you think about it, there are worse things that happen in a person's lifetime. And this isn't it.
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I still gots my A/C but it's clear out in the barn now.
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mdm1
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Posted: 07 Dec 2018 at 12:21pm |
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So what have you decided?
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Everything is impossible until someone does it! WD45-trip loader 1947 c w/woods belly mower, 1939 B, #3 sickle mower 1944 B, 2 1948 G's. Misc other equipment that my wife calls JUNK!
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Ted J
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Posted: 07 Dec 2018 at 9:06pm |
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I decided that I'll have another beer.....
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"Allis-Express"
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tadams(OH)
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Posted: 08 Dec 2018 at 2:18pm |
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Wife and I just got home Monday from a trip to Florida to see family, was gone 18 days the only problem is that we have both been sick with a cold every since we got back. We got to have Thanksgiving and Christmas with son and family it's a annual trip and the only way we get to see the Grandchildren.
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Ted J
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Posted: 08 Dec 2018 at 10:49pm |
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Well I don't think he's left already, it's 20 days off yet,,,,,,,,,,,so just a word of advice....
GIT PACKED!!!!
I lost my Dad TOoooo many years ago Les, and I'd give ANYTHING to be able to do ANYTHING with him again. I was 34 and he was 53. IF ONLY....
Or,
as said above,,,,,,What if.....
I'm serious buddy
Edited by Ted J - 08 Dec 2018 at 10:49pm
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"Allis-Express"
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DaveKamp
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Posted: 09 Dec 2018 at 12:40pm |
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I'm 51... My dad is 82.
He hasn't always seemed to be the best dad, and I'll admit, I've had times when I wasn't the best son... but I've made it a point over the last ten years to meet him for lunch about every day I can... and that opportunity tends to arise on the weeks I'm on night-phone duty... so every 8 weeks or so. In between, if I'm not out-of-town, I might get an occasional Saturday lunch in, and help him for a bit on an afternoon.
When my kids were young, I didn't get that chance much... and of course, he was a busy man, as was I.
Last few years have been tough on him... heart surgery, then back surgery, then emergency heart surgery (MRSA infection from prior surgeries darned near killed him). He had a very slight stroke amidst the battle this time last year... and I fully expected to be fatherless, but God let him stay with me a bit longer... and as always, a 'lifetime offer' is still only a 'limited time' offer... so I still make every opportunity possible.
My older brother sees my dad mebbie once a year... lives a couple thousand miles away. My sister lives closer, sees him mebbie 10-12 times a year.
I live three miles away, with my wife and kids.
There's lots of reasons why someone wouldn't do something, but the question is, are the reasons to DO something, strong enough to compel oneself, despite the reasons NOT...
And the clock ticks on... but we don't know for how long.
Henceforth, I have lunch with Dad... and when I can, I take my Son. Someday, there will be no Dad for me... and eventually, my Son will eat alone too...
Unless... my Son is lost before I go... then I will eat alone.
Edited by DaveKamp - 09 Dec 2018 at 12:41pm
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Ten Amendments, Ten Commandments, and one Golden Rule solve most every problem. Citrus hand-cleaner with Pumice does the rest.
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