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Kenny L. 
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: NEIOWA
Points: 1224
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 Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 2:52pm |
should of could of wood of it is what it is whatever trip your trigger
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 4:46pm |
0ut of the fryin pan and into the fire. Dumber than Ditch Water (only hear this one in Colorado} Lord Help Us All Step over a Dollar to pick up a dime Once in a blue moon Righty Tighty, Lefty Loosey A shot in the dark Meaner Than a JunK Yard Dog WHEN WE GET TO a MILLION OF THIS CUITNESS WE CAN QUIT KEN THANKS ALL WHO POSTED. KEEP EM COMMIN. LAFFIN MY ASS OFF Faster than a speeding bullet Undercover Lover with Bedroom Eyes Tighter than Bark on a Tree
Edited by Ken in Texas - 17 Mar 2018 at 6:28pm
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WF owner
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Joined: 12 May 2013
Location: Bombay NY
Points: 4388
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 6:10pm |
From the movie Days of Thunder: Like a monkey f@#%ing a football !!! |
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chaskaduo
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Joined: 26 Nov 2016
Location: Twin Cities
Points: 5203
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 6:28pm |
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Take a flying F at a rolling doughnut.
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1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 6:39pm |
Don't get your panties in a wad over small stuff Don't eat yellow snow None of your beeswax Three Strikes and Your Out Pissing into the wind
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 6:55pm |
Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free? We grew up so poor, Poor folks talked about us. So poor. When we asked for toys for Christmas, Dad cut the bottoms out of our pants pockets. Have you totally lost your everlovin mind? Don't look Ethel
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 6:57pm |
She is so Country, She makes Loretta Lynn look like a city slicker. A comedy of Errors
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acd17toy
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: USA
Points: 688
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 7:41pm |
My late father in laws favorite saying were, "colder than a bachlors kiss." "smother than a school marms legs".
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LouSWPA
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Clinton, Pa
Points: 24021
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 8:08pm |
 Les Royer wrote:
Colder than a well diggers azz
colder than a witches tat in a brass bra
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I am still confident of this;
I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Ps 27
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LouSWPA
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Clinton, Pa
Points: 24021
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 8:20pm |
Wayne180d wrote:
like a fart in church on a hot sunday morningNot a snowballs chance in hell His elevator does not go to the top floor slicker than snot Had a lady from Kentucky horse country would always say: Well f**k me running |
slicker than snot on a glass door knob
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I am still confident of this;
I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Ps 27
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 8:23pm |
Well I'll be a Monkeys Uncle. See no Evil, Hear no Evil, Speak no Evil. I have 3 little Monkeys to remind me of my evil ways. My Mistake. Everybody makes Mistakes .
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 8:30pm |
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A Cracker Jack Allis Mechanic
Edited by Ken in Texas - 17 Mar 2018 at 8:32pm
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shameless dude
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Joined: 10 Apr 2017
Location: east NE
Points: 13611
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 8:43pm |
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I don't give a feathered frogs butt
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Leesok
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: OK
Points: 516
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 9:28pm |
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If ya ain't gonna use your head, ya might as well have been born with two a$$es.
If the shoe fits, wear it.
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WF owner
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Joined: 12 May 2013
Location: Bombay NY
Points: 4388
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 9:30pm |
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He is a certified, card carrying Ahole.
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im4racin
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Joined: 12 Jun 2017
Location: Garrison ND
Points: 833
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 9:44pm |
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He has one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peal!
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desertjoe
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Joined: 23 Sep 2013
Location: New mexico
Points: 13358
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 9:48pm |
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Use your brain,,God didn't put it there to keep your ears there from flapping together.
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Ken in Texas
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Henderson, TX
Points: 5919
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 10:59pm |
measure twice. cut once. Flying off the handle around here gets you nothing. Go Ahead. Make my Day Goofy as a Road Lizard
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JohnCO
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Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Niwot Colo
Points: 8992
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Posted: 17 Mar 2018 at 11:55pm |
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Tighter then a drum
Old army mess hall one, "Grab your meat and beat it!"
Not playing with a full deck
Didn't think it could get worse then this, I was wrong.
Were you born in a barn? Shut the door.
Lincoln taste, Ford budget
You did WHAT?
Somebody said it was ok
I think he was standing behind the door when brains were given out.
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"If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer"
Allis Express participant
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Thad in AR.
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: Arkansas
Points: 9273
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 7:40am |
nervous as a whore in church nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rockin chairs busy as a one legged man in a ass kickin contest fubared quicker than the blink of an eye hotter than the hubs of hades pretty as a picture one i use on my guys at work 'you're softer than baby chit' he drinks like a fish drunk as a skunk drunker than a thousand comanchies drunker than Cooter Brown one step foreward and two steps back he's usin some fancy footwork that will go over like a fart in a wind storm that will go over like a lead baloon if i had that jeep and Shameless had a feather up his tail we'd both be tickled Redneck and proud of it cowboy up Jerry rigged chit or get off the pot chittin and a gettin don't piss down my back and tell me its raining i'd be on that like a hippie on a lost cause too many irons in the fire it's got a good ring to it
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Thad in AR.
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: Arkansas
Points: 9273
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 7:55am |
aint got much spring in his step well if that dont chap your ass go figure that figures chit fire and save matches drier than a popcorn fart kickin ass and takin names runnin around like a whooped pup tuck tail and run like peaches n cream he wants his cake and eat it too he'd bitch if they hung him with a new rope opinions are like azzholes, everybody has one kick a dog when he's down pick your poison
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Thad in AR.
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: Arkansas
Points: 9273
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 8:11am |
that boy could tear up an anvil with a rubber mallot ill whoop you like a naughty step child throw him to the wolves he's really slingin the chit now that ole Ford will get country like finding a needle in a hay stack bless yor little heart do i need to make you a sugar tit do you want a little cheese with your whine i'll whoop you with a black snake i'll whoop you with a hickory switch i'll strap your ass lay the leather to him take him out behind the wood shed work him like a rented mule workin like a dog sweatin like a hog sweatin bullets go piss up a rope pissin and moanin hell hath no fury like a woman scorned my cup runneth over he's fixin to open a can of whoop ass
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thendrix
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Joined: 04 Feb 2013
Location: Fairmount GA
Points: 4736
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 8:22am |
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Sh!t or get of the pot
Drunker then a bicycle
Queer as a football bat
Lost as a fart in a whirlwind
Edited by thendrix - 18 Mar 2018 at 8:25am
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"Farming is a business that makes a Las Vegas craps table look like a regular paycheck" Ronald Reagan
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Dusty MI
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Joined: 13 Sep 2009
Location: Charlotte, Mi
Points: 5053
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 8:55am |
Go ahead and do it your way, you will anyway.
Dusty
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917 H, '48 G, '65 D-10 series III "Allis Express"
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fixer1958
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Joined: 13 Feb 2010
Location: kansas
Points: 2435
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 8:58am |
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So broke I can't even pay attention.
Yes Dear..
Edited by fixer1958 - 18 Mar 2018 at 8:59am
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Steve in NJ
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: Andover, NJ
Points: 11550
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 9:49am |
Been there... done that! Been there, done that, got the t-shirt! Been to three worlds fairs and ain't never seen nothin' like that! Smoother than a babys ass! Cryin' the blues! Big Wienny Hiemer! Big Wiener! Tighter than a Crabs ass...and that's waterproof! So tight his wallet squeaks! More stubborn than an old mule! There's an ass for every seat Teach yer' kids how ta' walk n' talk then ya tell em' to shut up n' sit down! Was ta' Hell n' back! My father used to say: I'd squeeze a nickel till the buffalo  s!
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39'RC, 43'WC, 48'B, 49'G, 50'WF, 65 Big 10, 67'B-110, 75'716H, 2-620's, & a Motorhead wife
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Wayne180d
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Joined: 08 Dec 2015
Location: Gilman, Il
Points: 5923
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 10:05am |
He is so tight he squeaks when he walks He is so cheap he will put a 20 in the collection plate and make change
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fixer1958
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Joined: 13 Feb 2010
Location: kansas
Points: 2435
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 10:19am |
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Ass, Grass or Gas, Nobody Rides For Free
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im4racin
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Joined: 12 Jun 2017
Location: Garrison ND
Points: 833
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 11:39am |
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Heavier than a dead preacher
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desertjoe
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Joined: 23 Sep 2013
Location: New mexico
Points: 13358
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Posted: 18 Mar 2018 at 2:37pm |
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Hold my purse,,I'm gonna go get him.
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