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ole time home schooling

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JoeM(GA) View Drop Down
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    Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 10:51am
Someone sent me this this morning, I'm only 58, but remember these well! #2, #4, & #7
carried me through my early years!

Most of us over 65 were Home Schooled - in many ways
 
 
1 My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL  DONE.
  "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
 
2 My mother taught me RELIGION.
  "You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
 
3 My father taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
  I f you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
 
4 My father taught me LOGIC.
  "Because I said so, that's why.”
 
5 My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
  "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.”
 
6 My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
  "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.”
 
7 My father taught me IRONY.
  "Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.”
 
8 My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
  "Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
 
9 My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
  "Just you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
 
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
  "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
 
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
  "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
 
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
  "If I told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!”
 
13. My father taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
  "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
 
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
  "Stop acting like your father!”
 
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
  "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.”
 
16.My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
  "Just wait until we get home.”
 
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING
  "You are going to get it from your father when you get home!”
 
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
  "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”
 
19. My mother taught me ESP.
  "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?”
 
20. My father taught me HUMOR.
  "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.”
 
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
  "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.”
 
22.My mother taught me GENETICS.
  "You're just like your father.”
 
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
  "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”
 
24. My mother taught me WISDOM
  "When you get to be my age, you'll understand.”
 
25. My father taught me about JUSTICE .
  "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!”
 
 
This should be sent only to the over 60 crowd because the younger ones would not believe we truly were told these "EXACT" words by our parents.
 
Allis Express North Georgia
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fixer1958 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fixer1958 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 12:54pm
I heard every one of those.
Only other one was my dad telling me he forgot more that I
know right now.
He was right in some respect. Teenager....got everything under control.
What's so hard about everything???
Don't pay chit for anything...just have to keep the girlfriends happy.
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darrel in ND View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote darrel in ND Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 1:53pm
Must be universal parenting approach. I've heard them all when I was growing up. Said them all to my kids. Now hearing my son tell the grandkid some of it already. Darrel
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Bob D. (La) View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bob D. (La) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 5:23pm
You forgots one.

Well wish in one hand and shix in the other and see which one gets full the quickest.
When you find yourself in a hole,PUT DOWN THE SHOVEL!!!
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DMiller View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DMiller Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 6:11pm
I have heard ALL those and Bob D's too, more than once!!

Made most of my money the Hard way, WORKING FOR IT, so my Mom would set me how to save it. She passed away as I crossed thirty five, sad times for me.
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thendrix View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote thendrix Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 9:21pm
I don't remember hearing #19 but the rest of those are very familiar and were told multiple times through my childhood.

I'll add one though: my Pawpaw taught me how to pay for lunch. He'd say "you want to go to the chicken house with me?" "Not today Pawpaw" "Do you want to eat lunch?" "Yeah" "then get your ass up and come on! You don't eat for free here!"

There are several more, some not so family friendly. We'll save those for another day

Edited by thendrix - 27 Oct 2018 at 9:24pm
"Farming is a business that makes a Las Vegas craps table look like a regular paycheck" Ronald Reagan
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truckerfarmer View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote truckerfarmer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 Oct 2018 at 10:23pm
I just turned 50 and heard most of them growing up.
Looking at the past to see the future.
'53 WD, '53 WD45, WD snap coupler field cultivator, #53 plow,'53 HD5B dozer

Duct tape.... Can't fix stupidity. But will muffle the sound of it!
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Animal Cracker View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Animal Cracker Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Oct 2018 at 1:36am
We were never fat as kids,we were told to get outside and play
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Thad in AR. View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Thad in AR. Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Oct 2018 at 8:05am
Originally posted by Bob D. (La) Bob D. (La) wrote:

You forgots one.

Well wish in one hand and shix in the other and see which one gets full the quickest.

I was fixin to use that one on Shameless when he wanted pics of me in a thong and cowboy boots.
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desertjoe View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote desertjoe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Oct 2018 at 8:49am
 Actually,,,,those are all good examples of how to properly raise kids,,,although more than half of them would land your azz in jail if you gots a kid that would call the cops if you tried em on him/her,,,,,,LOL
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Ted J View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ted J Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Oct 2018 at 11:51am
Eat what's on your plate, this isn't a restaurant.
"Allis-Express"
19?? WC / 1941 C / 1952 CA / 1956 WD45 / 1957 WD45 / 1958 D-17
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chaskaduo View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote chaskaduo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Oct 2018 at 3:18pm
Mine was "eat what's in front of you, kids in Calcutta are starving".
1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp
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DiyDave View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DiyDave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Oct 2018 at 6:42pm
Yeah I usedta get that line about starving kids, wherever. I would reply, Send em this dreck, then...  Yeah, I usedta sit in the corner, a lot, as a kid...Wink
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