Spoon (H)
Printed From: Unofficial Allis
Category: Other Topics
Forum Name: Shops, Barns, Varmints, and Trucks
Forum Description: anything you want to talk about except politics
URL: https://www.allischalmers.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=157601
Printed Date: 23 Aug 2025 at 5:16am Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Spoon (H)
Posted By: Coke-in-MN
Subject: Spoon (H)
Date Posted: 26 Jan 2019 at 10:00am
A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organization. Last week, we took some friends to a new restaurant, 'Steve's Place,' and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket.
It seemed a little strange. When the Waiter brought our water and utensils, I observed that he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I inquired, 'Why the spoon?'
'Well,' he explained, 'the restaurant's owner hired Accenture Consulting to revamp all of our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour.
If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'
As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.' I was impressed.
I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly.
Looking around, I saw that all of the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?'
Certainly!' Then he lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also learned that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of our you-know-what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39%.
I asked quietly, 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?'
'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.'
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------------- Life lesson: If you’re being chased by a lion, you’re on a horse, to the left of you is a giraffe and on the right is a unicorn, what do you do? You stop drinking and get off the carousel.
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Replies:
Posted By: Hubert (Ga)engine7
Date Posted: 26 Jan 2019 at 10:23am

------------- Just an old country boy saved by the grace of God.
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Posted By: steve(ill)
Date Posted: 26 Jan 2019 at 1:34pm
NOW THATS FUNNY !!
------------- Like them all, but love the "B"s.
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Posted By: chaskaduo
Date Posted: 26 Jan 2019 at 1:49pm
X 2
------------- 1938 B, 79 Dynamark 11/36 6spd, 95 Weed-Eater 16hp, 2010 Bolens 14hp
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Posted By: desertjoe
Date Posted: 26 Jan 2019 at 10:12pm
X 55,,,,that is a great one,,,,,,, 
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Posted By: shameless dude
Date Posted: 26 Jan 2019 at 11:25pm
Posted By: Ted J
Date Posted: 27 Jan 2019 at 3:54pm
I heard it but it was about a bar owner and serving hot dogs,,,,,,,,,,,,,,with the tongs...
------------- "Allis-Express" 19?? WC / 1941 C / 1952 CA / 1956 WD45 / 1957 WD45 / 1958 D-17
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Posted By: DiyDave
Date Posted: 27 Jan 2019 at 6:17pm
This one reminds me of the local diner, true story...
Our local version of shameless, lets call hm Lee, fer short was sittin in the local diner, and I walked in, and another guy walked in, at the same time, bof of us ordered cheese burgers, then the waitress walked over to the freezer, opened it up, and was makin her way back to the grill, past Lee, as she passes, he asks her whatcha got there? She says, Oh, I just am defrostin a coupla burgers (1 in each armpit!) Lee stands up, and shouts cancel my M-F'n Hot dog! 
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Posted By: tadams(OH)
Date Posted: 28 Jan 2019 at 2:45pm
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