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Iowa TURD Debate

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steve(ill) View Drop Down
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    Posted: 14 Jan 2020 at 6:52pm
I think all the has beens and wanna bees will be at the local Dog and Pony Show tonight on the TV.... I don't think I can make it thru it... Have had my fill of BULL SH*T this week reading about Nancy and Schmucker and impeachment.
Trump Is Not A Lib or Conserv, He's a "Pragmatist." (someone who is practical and focused on reaching a goal. Has a straightforward, matter-of-fact approach and doesn't let emotion distract him or her
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steve(ill) View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote steve(ill) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 Jan 2020 at 6:54pm
BUTT, BUTT, BUTT.............. I can summarize this in a few words... FREE HOUSING, FREE HEALTH CARE, FREE EDUCATION, OPEN BORDERS, MORE ILLEGALS, HATE TRUMP, RAISE TAXES, SCREW THE PUBLIC, HATE THE MILITARY, DISBAND BORDER PATROL...
 
Now you don't have to watch... that's all they will say.
Trump Is Not A Lib or Conserv, He's a "Pragmatist." (someone who is practical and focused on reaching a goal. Has a straightforward, matter-of-fact approach and doesn't let emotion distract him or her
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DiyDave View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DiyDave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 Jan 2020 at 7:12pm
Warren, Sanders Settle Campaign Dispute By Playing Chicken On Mobility Scooters
January 14th, 2020

U.S.—Tensions between the Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren campaigns continue to grow, with new attacks emerging each day. In fact, Sanders and Warren have gotten so angry with each other that they’ve decided to engage in a dangerous game of chicken on their mobility scooters.

“Attack me as anti-feminist!” Sanders shouted as he revved his little scooter. “I’ll show you, toots!”

“My butler informed me you called me elitist!” yelled Warren from her blue high-end scooter. “I’m going to toss you in the trash like day-old caviar!”

Mobility scooters can reach speeds of up to 5mph, and a collision at that speed could break all their feeble old-people bones. Also, if they wrecked their scooters, they would be forced to walk around, and then they’d need even more naps on the campaign trail.Wink


AND:


Reminder: You No Longer Need A Color TV To Watch The Democratic Debates
January 14th, 2020

DES MOINES, IA—The FCC announced today that the next Democratic debate will not require viewers to use a color television. The decision was made in part due to the fact that all the remaining candidates are white. The FCC cites several other reasons for the change, however.

The FCC reminded everyone in a statement that the only color you'll need to make out the candidates' skin color is white.

“Listen, we didn’t want to leave anybody out,” said FCC employee Steven Penta. “Over one percent of American’s live without color TV, and that makes those folks a minority. We didn’t want to leave them out because, well, because this is America!”

Democrats, however, were unhappy with the news, insisting their party deserved better, more diverse candidates. “These people are all rich, white, privileged scum,” said Bernie Sanders as he rubbed a balloon on his head to prep for the debate. "If my opponents cared at all about diversity, they would drop out and let me win."

The FCC will soon ask viewers to upgrade to color television in advance of the presidential debates this fall, as the incumbent will require televisions that display a brilliant orange hue.WinkWink


AND:



Warning: Gang Of Known Criminals Holds Meeting To Discuss How Much Of Your Money To Steal
January 14th, 2020

DES MOINES, IA—Authorities are warning that a gang of known criminals is currently holding a meeting to debate various plots to steal your money.

The criminals are debating exactly how much of your money to steal. Some are suggesting stealing all of your money, while others would just like to steal most of your money. Whatever the case, they all agree on two things: A.) you have money and B.) it must be stolen.

"I know!" shouted one of the criminals, an older man with frizzy hair, known throughout the criminal underworld as a seasoned veteran when it comes to stealing people's money. "We could lower ourselves in through people's roofs and grab stuff like in that new movie the kids are talking about, Impossible Mission!"

"That movie is called Die Tough, you dummy," snapped one female gangster with the chiseled features of a Native American. "I think we should lie in wait in the bushes outside the mouth of a cliff in the American Southwest. Then, when the unsuspecting white man comes riding through on his horse or Tesla, we tomahawk 'em." She made a tomahawk gesture with her hand, only for another elderly man on the other side of her to grab her hand and begin sniffing it.

"Stealing money is an American pastime," he said as the frightened woman pulled her hand away. "Back in the '20s, Hotbox Nixon and Tommy-Gun Joe and I used to go driving around, taking down no-good ne'er-do-wells with our Tommy guns. Pow! Bang! Rat-a-tat-tat!"

"What were we talking about again?" he asked, snapping out of a daydream and realizing he'd been addressing a blank wall the entire time.

These criminals may seem like something out of a family-friendly screwball comedy, but authorities have warned that their plans to steal your money are very, very real.WinkWinkWink



Edited by DiyDave - 14 Jan 2020 at 7:17pm
Source: Babylon Bee
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steve(ill) View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote steve(ill) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 Jan 2020 at 7:23pm
YEP............. that about sums it up !
Trump Is Not A Lib or Conserv, He's a "Pragmatist." (someone who is practical and focused on reaching a goal. Has a straightforward, matter-of-fact approach and doesn't let emotion distract him or her
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pinball View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote pinball Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 Jan 2020 at 10:06pm
you know its sad when people get old and seem to forget things. I watched it for awhile then turned it over. what I saw was a man that is having some problems remembering or with his speech. I don't care how good of a person he has been. I could never vote for him. He is why we need term / age limits.
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Steve in NJ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Steve in NJ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 7:02am
Yeah, but look what you have up there for Candidates. A commie, a chronic lier, an man with demenia, a butt sniffer, a nobody, and a Billionare that doesn't know what else to do with his money, so here I am.  Gimme a break!  What a group!  Sheesh!   Thumbs Down
39'RC, 43'WC, 48'B, 49'IB, 49'G, 50'WF, 67'B-110, 75'716H, 2-620's, & a Motorhead wife
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote TimNearFortWorth Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 7:22am
I like it when I can start the day with a laugh: Clap


said Bernie Sanders as he rubbed a balloon on his head to prep for the debate
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Lonn View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Lonn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 7:29am
The funny thing is Steve, you can easily draw a line from the candidates name to your list of names without much thought.
-- --- .... .- -- -- .- -.. / .-- .- ... / .- / -- ..- .-. -.. . .-. .. -. --. / -.-. .... .. .-.. -.. / .-. .- .--. .. ... -
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote pinball Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 7:44am
What happened to Bernie. I thought he was going to pay with everything with the taxes from the top one percent. now he wants to tax all of us except the first 29,000. what a jerk
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steve(ill) View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote steve(ill) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 9:09am
well, eventually the TRUTH comes out pinball.
Trump Is Not A Lib or Conserv, He's a "Pragmatist." (someone who is practical and focused on reaching a goal. Has a straightforward, matter-of-fact approach and doesn't let emotion distract him or her
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DiyDave View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DiyDave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 8:34pm
All-White Democratic Debate Mistaken For KKK Rally
January 15th, 2020

DES MOINES, IA—Many were shocked to turn to CNN last night and see what appeared to be a Ku Klux Klan rally. Airing for two hours was an all-white assembly of people talking about their superior plans for the country. CNN received numerous complaints but explained it was not a Klan rally but in fact a Democratic presidential debate.

This confused many people, as there had been numerous minority candidates in the presidential primary, and this was what appeared to be a “whites only” debate. CNN explained that this was not true and that the debate had nothing to do with white supremacy; the DNC simply had excluded all minority candidates from the debate for being inferior to the white ones.

“And I have many black friends,” explained Joe Biden, an attendee of the not-Klan rally. “Like Barack Obama. And Corn Pop.”

Further confusing the issue was the fact that a cross was burned on stage during the “debate.” The Democrats explained, though, that this was not done in the racist sense that the KKK would do it but instead done simply to express a general disdain for religion.Wink

Source: Babylon Bee
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DiyDave View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DiyDave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 8:52pm
Source: Babylon Bee
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Brian Jasper co. Ia Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 Jan 2020 at 10:45pm
They all sound the same. Hate Trump, vote for me and I'll give you free stuff.
"Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the government take care of him better take a closer look at the American Indian." Henry Ford
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DiyDave Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 Jan 2020 at 7:12am
Source: Babylon Bee
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bob D. (La) Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 Jan 2020 at 10:15am
As brer' Rabbit proclaimed: Please Don't Throw Me In That Briar Patch.


While I know this is very unpleasant for President Trump, he is looking forward to at least some semblance of fairness as this goes through the Senate.
When you find yourself in a hole,PUT DOWN THE SHOVEL!!!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote TimCNY Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 Jan 2020 at 12:10pm
Originally posted by pinball pinball wrote:

What happened to Bernie. I thought he was going to pay with everything with the taxes from the top one percent. now he wants to tax all of us except the first 29,000. what a jerk

Quite simple. I'll change my business to a corporation, collect $28,999 in salary, and then the rest in non-taxable dividends from my "new corporation" until they catch on and change the law again. By that time maybe I'll find a nice little place in Belize... This country just made it out of the asylum in time, the Progressives were just about ready to send it to the crematory declaring it dead while it was still in the coma they induced. Thank GOD for Doctor Trump knocking them out of the way, pulling the IV, and resuscitating at the last minute. But I do not believe for one moment that we'll survive the next attempt on the life of this nation. THEY LEARNED. They're patient. It's all about incrementalism.
I need more than 200 characters for my "signature." I'd love to see that changed to 250!
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